Up until about a week ago, I had never stepped foot in a helicopter, let alone my body. On a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the kind of flyer that coolly sits back, scratches their crotch and orders another Jameson & ginger during the most hardcore of turbulence, and 1 being the kind of flyer who requires two and a half Xanax along with their morning jug of wine, I am about a 7. Maybe a 6.5 on a bad day.
So when I was told I would be going on a work-sponsored helicopter tour of Maui, I was somewhere between slightly nervous and super freaking pumped.
Maui Helicopter Tours
Hawaii is probably one of the best places for helicopter tours in the world. Not only do you get to see several of mother nature’s kickass wonders, like volcanoes, mountains, the ocean and other islands in the distance, but you may even see humpback whales (we totally did), active lava flows, waterfalls, famous surf breaks and even naked humans! Not that we saw naked humans, but people in Hawaii hang out naked a lot. It’s hot. It’s lovely. You’re practically 85% naked 50% of the time anyway… it just makes sense.
My coworker and I showed up at the Kahului Heliport on a slightly voggy (fog from the volcanoes on the Big Island), but sunny and practically windless morning, ready for aerial adventures of the Maui kind.
Sexy Ass Ride for the Day, aka Edna the Eco-Star
There are several tour options depending on which area of the island you’re most interested in, but we were lucky enough to be invited on the Complete Island Tour in the eco-star helicopter model, which, by my estimation, is like the Ritz Carlton of the helicopter world. ‘Cause who wants to fly around in a Holiday Inn, y’all?!
As a prize for being the prettiest riders of the day (why else?), we got to sit up front with Ms. Glenda “The Good Witch” helicopter pilot, who flew us up, up, and away over the West Maui Mountains, West Maui coastline, the windmills, Kihei Town, Upcountry Maui, Haleakala Crater, Hana Town, and finally over the north shore before heading back to Central Maui. Check out the scenery…
West Maui Mountains slash A Beach You Want To Be On
West Maui Mountains slash A Town You Want to Live In (Lahaina Town) slash a Baby Cruise Ship (not actual baby size) slash a Crevice You Definitely Don’t Want To Fall Into
South Maui (we live about two blocks behind where that boat is leaving – nice!) slash Beautiful Upcountry Maui and The Big Island in the Distance
Haleakala Crater (Manhattan could fit inside there) slash More Crevices You Definitely Don’t Want to Fall Into
Coastline of North Shore Maui slash Coastline along the Road to Hana (Keanae? Not sure, but regardless, it’s lovely)
West Maui Mountains slash Sugarcane Fields slash Paia Town (where I work!) slash Beauty for Days
If you’re having trouble finding Maui Wowie, at least there’s an equally awesome way to get high on Maui…
Mahalo to Glenda for delivering us back to the ground super safely, and mahalo to Maui for providing the daily scenery that makes places like Waco, Texas, look like a hungover hooker in the morning.
