Over and over again, rock fever seems to come up as a recurring topic when it comes to living full time in Hawaii. “Oh, I could definitely vacation there for a couple of weeks, but after that I think I’d freak out and have to go back home.” And lest you be conned into thinking this is a regular issue among people who live here (it’s not), I’m going to offer some perspective on the art of avoiding rock fever.
Avoiding Rock Fever: The Maui Edition
First of all, Maui is 727 square miles. For an island, that’s pretty damn big. Here are 5 islands that are smaller than Maui: Oahu, Grand Bahama, Padre Island, Cozumel and Phuket. Long Island is twice the size of Maui (with 50x the population) and all of Manhattan could fit in the crater at the top of Haleakala Volcano. It’s not like the people in Manhattan constantly freak out about being in a tiny area and make regular weekend trips to Bermuda or Europe. Well, not the ones that aren’t Jay Z, at least. And even if they do, they’re probably leaving a giant, congested city to go somewhere that they hope looks a lot like Maui.
Second of all, you could spend days and days and days exploring Maui and still find more shit you haven’t done. Go on a hiking trail to waterfalls, through bamboo forests, in a cloud forest, down a volcanic crater, through mountains, along lava remnants, whatever. Learn how to surf, go swim in a natural pool, take a bike ride, do yoga on the beach, nap in a hammock, snorkel with turtles, go see a hula show, whale watch, learn how to play the ukelele, sit back and watch the sunset. Just because you’re on an island doesn’t mean there’s nothing to do. Unless you really, really like shopping in crowded outlet malls, bottle service at nightclubs and watching girls with low self esteem dance on a pole, you really aren’t missing much. And even then, just hop over to Oahu.
I’ve officially lived on Maui a little over a year and regularly get out and explore WAY more than I ever did living in Texas. Maui is probably even a close second to how far I drove to do things in Dallas, except way more scenic and way less likely to result in ass sweats and night terrors. If you own a vehicle on Maui, escaping to an entirely different climate, view, and vibe is only a short drive away. And it rocks.
Thirdly, you’re in tropical heaven. Millions and millions of people spend millions and millions of dollars to come here every year. It’s not a place people are typically desperate to escape. Even as a person who absolutely loves big cities, I can enjoy most perks of big city life – people watching, restaurants, scenic walks – without the annoying aspects of it – traffic, crime, bad weather and the general smell of sidewalks caked in decades of urine (I’m lookin’ at you, New York).
That being said, there are certain things I miss about non-Maui life, such as the ability to go out and dance in public to music that is not a drum circle and attending activities of the exciting nature that do not promptly end at 10pm.
But I’ll take it.
If you’re still that stressed about moving to Hawaii and getting rock fever, maybe move somewhere that isn’t the most isolated population center on Earth. Der.